Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Pride and Prejudice.

"Be the change you wish to see in the world." - Mahatma Gandhi

I wish to see a change in the Church... and I've been struggling with it/ thinking about it for a long time. God showed me this weekend that in order to see that change, I need to embody that change. And I think most of the things that bother me in the Church are only frustrating to me because they reflect the dying, decaying parts of myself.
Pride. As Christians, we are called to be everything but proud, unless we are proud of Christ's death and resurrection (Gal 6:14). Why, then, do so many of us continue to "brag" about our spirituality, our closeness to Christ, our achievements, our behaviors? The possibilities are endless of the things we can (and do) boast about. I'm sick of it! I am sick of feeling like I need to prove myself. You may be thinking, "Hallie, that's your problem. You don't have anything to prove, and it's entirely your doing/ your fault if you feel like you need to prove something to people." I would agree--I'm at fault. But, I think this issue with pride is a group effort from the Church. I was raised in a church where people cared more about their spiritual appearance than the glorification of God. In effect, I have inherited the practice of bragging, competing, etc. in my spiritual life and relations with others. Maybe, I wouldn't be as proud and competitive and proud if I had never felt "challenged" by my spiritual peers. How do we defeat pride? It's destroying our Church. It's destroying our ability to draw close to God.
Side note. The number 13 has been EVERYWHERE for me lately. Let me give you a few examples. I was born on the 13th in room 213, my boyfriend was born on the 13th, I look at the clock every day at 10:13, I see the number 13 everywhere I look... so there must be some significance, right? God revealed to me a while ago that my life would be similar to the life of Jeremiah... or at least that the book of Jeremiah would be helpful for me for my entire life. Sunday, I read Jeremiah 13. Here's the jist (although I recommend you go read the whole thing for yourself!)
Basically, the Lord asks Jeremiah to buy a loincloth and bury it under a rock by the river. After a long time, the Lord asks Jeremiah to go and take it out. When he does, the loincloth is rotting and decaying. Here's what the Lord says: "This shows how I will rot away the pride of Judah and Jerusalem. These wicked people refuse to listen to me. They stubbornly follow their own desires and worship other gods. Therefore, they will become like this loincloth--good for nothing! As a loincloth clings to a man's waist, so I created Judah and Israel to cling to me. They were to be my people, my pride, my glory--an honor to my Name. But they would not listen to me." -Jer. 13:8-11
We are not to be proud. We are to be God's pride. I don't know how to get there, or even how to start the journey. But I'm ready to go.


  1. You're a numbers girl! That's so awesome...

    I love that you are open to God revealing things to you and speaking Truth into you. You're about to embark upon a really exciting adventure with Him. My advice? Strap in -- it's going to be craaaazy fun!

  2. Your thoughts continue to amaze me...you are right and it's a big struggle for me. Not pride in myself or my spirituality, but my project for the last 21 years - my children. I think they are more humble than I am most of the time! Love you.